I've been lurking on Mumsnet and Netmums reading various threads about fussy eaters.
In some respects its music to my ears, or rather eyes to read how many mums struggle to get their kids to eat a varied diet or indeed anything healthy at all but in other respects its really quite heartbreaking to read page after page of frustration, knowing that these are loving families who just want what's best for their kids and yet are constantly told to do battle.
I've almost finished writing my book on feeding fussy eaters and am in the slow process of taking forward to publication now but I can see that much of the advice is needed NOW! So, I've decided to start a blog. I'm not sure how this works or whether this will be the final location and format even but it's a start, at last!
I've been reading a lot about neophobia, which is where kids are quite literally terrified of trying new things and this is apparently behind many fussy eaters. There seems to be a huge school of thought which says not to pander to a fussy eater and to keep giving them whatever the rest of the family are eating and eventually they'll come round rather than starve. I find that quite Victorian and barbaric to be honest. If your kid was afraid of heights you wouldn't dangle him by his toe from the top of a sky-scraper to teach him not to be, would you? So why make a child confront the fear of new foods?
There are also quite a few techniques put forward by various experts which take a lot of time and effort by the families and probably schools involved too - let's face it a kid who won't eat what you give him at home will probably fill up on what they do like elsewhere. I find these techniques to be completely unrealistic and they ignore the fact that many of us are working mums who simply don't have the time or the energy to do battle each day with our off-spring.
OK, so less of where everyone else is going wrong and on to where I think I can help you to get it right.
The first step is to sit down with your fussy eater and talk about it - this is probably more productive with older children than with toddlers but even with very small children they can usually express some preferences, even if they can't give reasons for them. Most fussy eaters realise that they are fussy and different - they probably dread going to friends' homes for meals and finding they can't eat anything on offer, and would love to expand their food repertoire. So acknowledge with them that their is a bit of a problem and that you want to help them with it.
Then, get down to what it is they do like. Grade those things, working out the things they really like down to those things they really just tolerate. Then look at why - is it the taste, the look, the texture, the smell, the fact that they had that food the day they first saw their favourite movie...........and focus on the things they like most.
Next go on to things they know they don't like - specifics and they must be things they have actually tried as opposed to foods they just think they wouldn't like. Again, grade them and try to work out what it is about these foods they don't like.
Ask them if they would be willing to play a game of blind tasting - they wear a blindfold and they have a bucket or large bowl in front of them and are allowed to spit out foods they don't like. They need to have a glass of water or something similar to be able to rinse tastes away too. Try them on foods you know they like as well as sneaking one or two in that you think may be similar in taste but which aren't currently in the "will eat" list. This should give you an idea of how discerning their taste buds really are!
It can be interesting for them to learn how smell effects the tastebuds - so let them taste foods blindfolded whilst holding their nose - see if they can tell the difference between broccoli and cauliflower!
Once you've got a fair idea of the things they do like, you can start to embark on secret cheffing.......
And that'll be the subject of my next post!
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